Newsflash: pigeons that live at the Nürburgring are not faster than regular pigeons. We thought they might possess some superhuman (superpigeon?) speed, but no. Bear down on one at 190-odd kph and you’ll still catch it out. Poor thing.

The windscreen on which this particular pigeon is smeared (skip to 3:30, if you haven’t already) belongs to a AC Schnitzer ACL2, which its maker claims is the fastest road-legal BMW to lap the Nordschleife. With touring car driver Markus Oestreich at the wheel it set a 7:25.8 lap, making it a couple of seconds quicker than an M4 GTS.

Admittedly the ACL2 is a pretty serous thing. That it’s a BMW at all is debatable. It used to be a normal M235i, then AC Schnitzer removed the engine and replaced with the one from the M4, added more power (for 562bhp) and much suspension.